Welcome to this ‘Mediation Quick Tips’ Newsletter Issue 13
Safe Challenging Questions – Appropriateness & Timing
In this #MediationQuickTip newsletter I will refer to the criteria for judging if your question is safe and if the timing is right for asking a challenging question.
NOTE!
The 2nd Edition of ‘The Mediator’s Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes’, published 10th June 2025 can be ordered on amazon.com or waterstones.com or on amazon.co.uk and other well known websites.
Next O’Sullivan Solutions online advanced mediation courses:
January 29, 30, February 5, 6 – 2026
Time Schedule for all advanced mediation courses:
Irish Standard Time: / GMT: 1.30pm -5.30pm
Four half days – Live zoom course
advanced level mediator training
1. Use the Principles of Mediation as a Reference Point Before Asking a Question
When in doubt as to whether to ask a particular question, one of the options that may help is to use the principles of mediation as a reference point.
If the type of question, or the stage at which a mediator would like to ask it, contravenes any of these mediation principles, then think carefully about how you will bring out the information you need without breaching mediation principles. Remember that adhering to the mediation principles is what will protect you, your practice and your clients.
Principles of Mediation (VICS):
- Voluntariness
- Impartiality /Multipartiality
- Confidentiality
- Self-determination
2. Timing
I have referred to the function of the amygdala in previous newsletters but it is important to mention it again as we need to work with the knowledge of the function of the amygdala and not ask questions that could result in a party feeling vulnerable or under threat as this could inadvertently trigger an amygdala hijack and they may not be able to think clearly or logically.
Refer to #MediationQuickTips Newsletters – Issues 1, 2, and 3 – for more information on emotions and the role of the amygdala in our limbic system.
Refer to Chapter 3 in The Mediator’s Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes.
Next Newsletter
In this #MediationQuickTip newsletter I will cover the use of signposting during a mediation session and giving power to the parties to influence the process.
NOTE!
The 2nd Edition of ‘The Mediator’s Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes’, published 10th June 2025 can be ordered on amazon.com or waterstones.com or on amazon.co.uk and other well known websites.
Next O’Sullivan Solutions online advanced mediation courses:
January 29, 30, February 5, 6 – 2026
Time Schedule for all advanced mediation courses:
Irish Standard Time: / GMT: 1.30pm -5.30pm
Four half days – Live zoom course
advanced level mediator training
